Funny Pics / Funny Stories

Some time ago in Russia there were only party officials who were allowed cars and there was a lot of speeding. Traffic policemen were told to give out fines no matter who was involved.
One Sunday evening President Putin was leaving his cabin in the country . He said to his driver we are going to be late back to Moscow. You'd better let me drive. Soon they were speeding back to Moscow and they were seen by two traffic policemen on motorcycles. One officer gave chase and five minutes later he was back with his colleague.

Colleague 1 : Did you give them a fine ?
Colleague 2. " No".
Colleague 1. " Why not ? "
Colleague 2. "Because they were too important "
Colleague 1. " Who was it ?
Colleague 2. " I've no idea but President Putin was his driver. " johnB.

A blonde walked into an electronics store and said to the salesmen: "I want that tv."

The salesperson shook his head and said, "No, we don't sell to blondes."

So the blonde left and came back with her hair dyed brown and said: "I'll take that tv."

Again the salesman said: "No, we don't sell to blondes."

So she left again and came back with her hair dyed black and said: "I want that tv."

But the salesman still said: "No, we don't sell to blondes."

Finally the blonde got fed up and said, "That's it! How'd you know I was a blonde?!" she asked.

The salesman answered: "Cause that's a microwave."

Kidding around

On a Miami­ to Chicago flight was a lively youngster who nearly drove everyone crazy. He was running up and down the aisle when the flight attendant started serving coffee. He ran smack into her, knocking a cup of coffee out of her hand and onto the floor.

As he stood by watching her clean up the mess, she glanced up at the boy and said, ‘”Look, why don’t you go and play outside?”