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gerardM a écrit:No Muriel, it's deeper than you mean... many people do the same things on and on but expect something different as the result.

yes Gérard, you are right. Pehaps it is not so easy to change.

gerardM a écrit:

Muriel,
This will be the 1st piece of advice.

You know I'm often around tennis courts supporting players: easy from the side but I can often see players being led and unable to catch up - 1st advice: change anything, stop playing the same way as your opponent likes this - rush to the net, try lifts or chops, try anything but please don't go on playing their game! Al was right

« life scenarios » recorded from early childhood are difficult to change.

Muriel,

You're not obliged to think this applies to impossible features only - see my example.

Gérard
Thanks for your example. Anyway I have talked a lot with a friend of mine about transactional analysis and I can't help thinking about what he had told me. For instance his parents have kept telling him 2 things at a time. "go on and stop".  Now he can't see commitments through. It is very hard for him  to change. It is possible if he  works on himself. Have a look on the link below, it is very interesting. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Transactional_analysis

Yes love is every where...such an invisible strength !

Thanks Gérard for that nice story about "what's a man ?"

Muriel, I knew feminists would like

Hi Gérard, everyone
I also think that people 's solutions remain in their own hands. Listening and being friendly is the only things we can do to help.